More and more these days Christians feel compelled to speak out on political issues that run contrary to God’s will for his creation. When done in a respectful and winsome way, sharing God’s truth can be life giving and a blessing to our society. After all, Jesus said we are to be the “salt of the earth,” preserving and bringing flavor to the world around us.

But we run into trouble when we confuse this desire to speak truth to the society around us with the need to show God’s love and care to individuals. I am good friends with a gay man who regularly attends our church. The other day after church one of our other fellow members apparently approached him and gave him a 10 minute lecture on the Respect for Marriage Act that was then being considered in Congress. I have no idea what he was hoping to accomplish in that conversation. In that moment his need to proclaim God’s truth (as he saw it) outweighed any consideration for his fellow believer and what he might have been seeking as he came to church that day.

On the night before Jesus was arrested he gave his disciples an amazing “new commandment.” He told them simply to “love one another.” And then he attached an amazing consequence to that new commandment. He said it was by this (loving one another) that people would know that we are His disciples. As we create loving communities of believers, people see Jesus in us, and want to be a part of those communities as well.

Speak God’s truth to the world around us. Show God’s love to one another. Never confuse the two. Sounds like a plan to me.

One of the questions I get asked a lot comes from someone who has a gay member of their family who is getting married. They may hold a more “traditional” view of marriage, and as a result feel like they are dishonoring God or compromising their beliefs by attending the wedding. So they ask me, “Should I go to the wedding?”

I always answer their question with a question of my own. “What do you think Jesus would do?” I remind them that one of the big criticisms of Jesus by the religious leaders of the day was that he “ate with tax collectors and sinners.” Jesus didn’t care what people thought about where he went and who he hung out with. He loved being with people, and he cared about them deeply. I try to help them come to the conclusion that Jesus would indeed attend that family wedding. And he’d probably have a great time!

The interesting thing about these conversations is they almost always end the same way… with joy and relief that they can go to the wedding! 99% of the time they knew the right thing to do, but suspected I was going to counsel them in a different direction. When I encourage them to be gracious and loving, they are eager to do so. They have experienced God’s unconditional love and acceptance, and look forward to sharing that love with others. We love because he first loved us.

Go to the wedding! Share God’s love. Have a blast!

When it comes to showing love to people in the LGBTQ community, many churches struggle. And because the churches struggle, the members of those churches struggle too. My hope and prayer is that I can help congregations and Christians do a better job showing God’s love and grace to people from the LGBTQ community. This blog is one way to raise issues and get people thinking.

After over 40 years of ministry I have encountered many different ministry situations concerning LGBTQ people. I’ll share some of those stories here. I’ll also share the things I’ve learned from these people and their stories. If they are helpful to you, great! If not, thanks for at least giving them a read.

Hopefully I will challenge some of the things you think when it comes to ministry to LGBTQ people. I’m not looking to change what you believe the Bible says about the issue. That’s between you and God. But I have found that, no matter what their theological perspective, churches and individual Christians struggle to put God’s unconditional grace and love into practice on this issue. John tells us an amazing thing in the first chapter of his Gospel. Referring to Jesus, he says, “From his fullness we have all received grace upon grace.” (v. 16) How can we be “grace upon grace” people to all, including those who may be different than us, or hard for us to understand?

Please join me on the journey!